Jesus cannot speak without also giving Himself. His words, who He is, draws out of me my true questions, thoughts, desires, hopes, and fears. Sometimes it is difficult for me to articulate these things. Maybe I'm embarrassed. Maybe I am ashamed. Maybe I think they're too good to be true.
But Christ my Savior will help me ask my own questions...and He stays with me as I ask.
What transformation Peter must have undergone when he met Jesus on the seashore. He denied Jesus three times. He now comes to look upon the Resurrected Christ, who is cooking breakfast.
“I thought that since I denied you…”
“I thought that since I did it many times…”
“I thought that since I’m broken…”
“…that things would be different.”
“…that you don’t love me the same.”
“…that I’m not worthy of you.”
Recently I have been imagining Jesus’ threefold asking of Peter.
"Simon, son of John, do you love me?"
"Simon, son of John, do you love me?"
"Simon, son of John, do you love me?"
But what if it was Peter who was really wondering
“Jesus, do you love me?
Jesus, do you love me?
Jesus, do you love me?”
But perhaps he was too broken to ask. So Jesus asked for him, stirring up within Peter his own true question that very much needed to come out. For if anyone at that point needed to know love, it was Peter who needed to know 1) that Jesus loved him still and 2) that Jesus was still calling him to love him in return. Jesus knows the way to the heart through shame and resistance. Jesus knows how to get me to ask my true questions...which are also His.
